IELTS: Please give your valuable comments on my writing

by shrahmann
(Milan, Itay)

Meadowside Village development

Meadowside Village development

Hi frndz, please correct me, or suggest me on following writing It would be a great support. I need to score at least 7.0.


Topic: Meadowside village development (task 1)



The illustration portrays the progression of Meadowside village into a suburb from 1962, through 1985 to the present date and it clearly shows how the village has developed its facilities and improved its living standard with time.
In 1962, it was a small village with very little infrastructure, even there were no direct connection with the city, Fonton, by road. The only noteworthy construction was a wide road crossing the village from west to north. However by the year 1985, it developed a number of facilities, like a leisure complex, a housing state and a supermarket beside a main road and these facilities, altogether, upgraded the quality of life of the village people. Moreover, a new branch of the old main road was built towards east which connected the village with Fonton city and it significantly improved the communication and transport and also open a new opportunity of further expanding the village area.
With the continued development the village, it has now emerged as a suburb. A rail station was established further improving the communication with the city. A business park is constructed in a very strategic position, beside the main road and very distant from rail station. Near the rail station, a hotel is also founded.
Altogether, the conspicuous advancement of Meadowside village with a number of new establishments has added lots value not only to its economy and communication but also raised the society to a new standard.


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Regards
Shan

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Feb 20, 2011
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by: Admin

Hi Shan,

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